


Be My Mistake

by ycviloria



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-06-01
Packaged: 2020-03-06 14:59:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18853405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ycviloria/pseuds/ycviloria
Summary: Rosé was Jennie's anchor, just as how Jennie was Rosé's.Moving back to Seoul, Rosé didn't know what to expect. Things must be so different now, she says. One thing she's mostly scared about is crossing paths with Jennie.The universe works its magic and they cross paths in the most unforeseen circumstances.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Be My Mistake](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/481636) by The 1975. 



I take a glance at the greenhouse, knowing it will be the last time.

 

Before I know it, I'm stepping into the greenhouse. The door creeks and I am once again staring into the nothingness. This place holds so much memories, mostly bad ones. But she has helped me see the light. She was my anchor while I was drowning. She has saved my life without knowing it, and that was what made her so much special. She was there when I needed her the most.

 

I didn't even notice I was crying until I felt a tear down my cheek. I know I'm leaving for good but I can't feel but be sad I'm leaving her without bidding my farewells.

 

I take a little post it from my bag and my pen. I write our favorite quote from our favorite movie.

_"Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, J." — Chaeng._

 

I leave it on the bench where we often sit every time our worlds seem to be such a mess. This place has been our safe haven. I hope they keep this, even though I know I won't step a single foot in this place again.

 

The door flungs open and I'm hit by the November breeze. It has gotten cold, and I realize my mom is calling out for my name.

 

"Rosie? We need to go, sweetie. We'll be late for our flight." she shoves the last suitcase into the trunk. Her voice is somehow filled with... sadness? I'm not exactly sure for what, but I guess it's comforting to know that she's sad leaving this house despite the shit she's gone through.

 

"Yeah, I'm ready mom." I've told myself I'm not going to cry again. I know that's impossible but I can at least do everything I can to forestall the tears.

 

"I love you, J. You were the best friend anyone could ask for." my thoughts cloud as my mom drives us to the airport.


	2. ROSÉ

College had always been so crucial as they say it would determine your future. Applying for colleges wasn't as easy as people say. I haven't heard back from University of Melbourne nor Australian National University yet, and I'm starting to think I failed them all. One thing is for sure though, I have already passed Seoul National University but I honestly don't feel like moving back to Korea. Well worst case scenario, I would have to.

 

• • • 

 

My back meets the booth behind me and I fold my arms across my chest. I look at my mom and I know she will support me for that but I can't help but feel bad I would have to leave her here.

 

"Rosie?" She clears her throat and reaches out for my hands. "I'm gonna be okay here, really. Go chase your dreams in Seoul. If it goes bad, then you can move back here. It's gonna be fine." I sigh in defeat.

 

"Fine, I'll give it a try. But please, do take care of yourself for me. I will try and visit as often as I can,"

 

Her fingers drum the sides of her coffee cup as she watches me fight back my tears.

 

• • • 

 

I inhale a deep breath and push it out of my head as I watch my mom drive away. I grab my suitcases and head inside with not much time to spare before my flight. The airport is still buzzing despite it being so early in the morning, so I maneuver my way through the crowd and to a kiosk. I print my boarding pass, check my luggage, and make my way to security.

 

I try not to think about what I'm doing. How I'm about to move all the way back to Seoul where no one probably remembers me. Or I guess I have Lisa, but she's probably busy with her career and studies that she won't have much time for me. The thought makes me want to jump into a cab and ride back home. But no, I shake my head to get rid of these thoughts.

 

I have to do this.

 

I pull my driver's license out of my bag and prepare to hand it to the security agent as I wait in line. There are 7 people in front of me.

 

Seven people is enough time to talk myself out of moving back to Seoul, so I close my eyes and think about everything exciting about Seoul.

 

 

• • •

 

"Rosie, oh my god! I missed you so much." Lisa pulls me into a tight embrace as soon as she spots me from the crowd. I embraced her back and bury my head into her shoulder. I'm so glad she agreed to pick me up from the airport despite her having dance practice today.

 

"I'm so glad you're back. I have so much stuff to tell you! Let's go and grab something to eat." Lisa helps me to carry my suitcases into her car.

 

 

• • •

 

The sun sets and I didn't notice it has been a whole three hours since Lisa and I have been talking. I'm so grateful she let me stay in her dorm, it hasn't even been a full day and I already feel like I owe her so much.

 

"Aren't you tired? You should sleep, you're probably jetlagged right now." I shake my head no. The last thing I'm feeling right now is exhaustion.

 

"Is the greenhouse still up in our old house? I have always wondered if it was kept." Lisa looks up to me as soon as I shoot her the question. I'm standing in front of the kitchen counter, waiting for the coffee to brew. I know it's late but I really need coffee right now.

 

"Yeah, I guess so. I haven't really heard from the new owners of the house. But I heard the greenhouse was renovated and kept." She shrugs, her eyes glued to the TV.

 

The days come by fast and tomorrow would be the orientation day. It's such a relief that Lisa lives close to the campus, so I wouldn't have to take dreadful bus rides.

 

We make our way to the café right on the corner of the university for our usual coffee run. My blood reeks of caffeine, it's one thing I need to function throughout the day.

 

"Rosie, I have to go, I'm running late. I'll see you later." Lisa hugs me and walks towards the architecture building. My class doesn't start until an hour, so I decide to go over my planner. Since I was a kid, I have always loved plotting out everything I do. Every hour counts for me, and it has always been that way. Once I'm satisfied, I slowly stand up to leave until someone bumps into me, spilling my coffee all over my planner.

 

"Great, fuck." I mutter under my breath.

  
"Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to. Are you okay?" A familiar voice says. A voice I have been wanting to hear for years.


	3. JENNIE

"Fuck." I said as soon as I take a glance on the clock. It's 8 AM, which means I just missed my first class. In the first semester.

 

I scrambled across the room and managed to get ready in 20 minutes. I decided to go to the cafe just across the dormitories, as I would still have about 30 minutes for my next class.

 

I was making my way through the crowd when I accidentally bumped into someone.

 

She mutters something under her breath which I couldn't figure out. When I realized I spilled coffee all over her planner, I immediately came up and apologized. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to. Are you okay?" As soon as the words came out of my mouth, she stopped her tracks and hurried out of the café.

 

Well, that was weird. Anyways, the week passes really quickly and I can't wait for frosh weekend party. I've been told it's really huge here. I put on the best dress I could find in my closet and grabbed Jisoo's makeup kit. Knowing that bitch, she's probably snugging up with her boyfriend or with Dalgom. There is no in between.

 

I mentally reminded myself to buy a car. I'm glad Kai has agreed to pick me up, buses are really just dreadful here especially on a Friday night.

 

Most of the drive was quiet, The Fray playing on the background. You wouldn't really think Kai is the type of guy to listen to them. At first, he would seem like the guy who's emo and shit.

 

"Why isn't Jisoo with you?" Kai breaks the thickening ice.

 

"Oh, please," I rolled my eyes dramatically. "She's probably already there with his boyfriend."

 

"Eh, I guess. For real, you should always actually put an effort to your appearance. You look great tonight." He says as his eyes stay glued to the street.

 

When he realizes I'm dumbfounded, he continues, "I'm not saying you're ugly without makeup, shit. You're just prettier, you know what I mean." When he pulls up to a huge ass house with lots of cars parked, I silently thanked we got here so I wouldn't have to respond. That was fucking awkward.

 

I quickly jump out of the car and hurried on the house. A lot of red cups are trashed on the lawn, and there are a few groups playing some stuff I couldn't even name.

 

I walk into the crowded living room and am handed a red cup. I turn to decline with a polite “No, thank you,” but it’s too late and I don’t have a clue who gave it to me. I put the cup on the counter and continue to walk through the house.

 

"Well Chaeng, it's your turn!!!" I heard someone yell. I'm going dizzy and I haven't even drunk yet. No, it's not HER. It couldn't be. Her name is too common. It's just a coincidence.

 

Just right as I turn around to see who it was, she was there. Standing, her messy hair pulled in a bun... and laughing. She's fucking laughing.

 

"Damn, Jennie. You're too fucking quick. You left this in my car." Kai's breathing was ragged and loud, which caught her attention.


	4. ROSÉ

"What are you gonna do besides sulk on your bed all day?" Lisa asks while she was washing her face. I give it a thought for a while, knowing I have no plans for the weekend since I have gone through the syllabus in advanced.

 

When she realizes I haven't answered, she continues, "Come with me tonight, they're having the annual frosh party thing."

 

"Oh, please no." I groan. The thought of it is just unappealing, as most people there would probably be seniors or sophies. The idea of getting drunk is also just as unpleasant. Not after what happened the first time I got wasted.

 

She continues to beg me while she teases her hair and changes into three different outfits before deciding on a black velvet dress.

 

"Well, suit yourself..." She gets her pouch and heads out to the door. Perhaps it wouldn't be too bad if I go, just this one time? Oh god. It has only been a week and I'm at a party. Okay. Just one time. The sound of staying at home doing nothing is not so good.

 

"Lisa, wait!"  I say, and she jumps up and down, clapping her hands.

 

•••

 

  
Lisa has a bad habit of calling me Chaeng when she's drunk. Gosh, she's feisty and I'm jealous.

 

"Loosen up, Chaeng!" She giggles, obviously intoxicated. “I think . . . I need . . . the room is starting to spend, Chaeng . . . I mean spin,” she says, laughing.

 

I start to loosen up, and poured myself a sour cherry vodka. When I started to become dizzy, I realize I have lost track of the amount of glasses I have taken.

 

"Let's play Truth or Dare!" Lisa slurs and their small group of friends gather around the couch. "Chaeng, come here!" She taps the seat beside her and I do sit just there. A blue haired guy hands me a bottle of scotch and I take a swig. Another pink haired girl joins the group making it the 5 of us.

 

The first few truths and dares include the pink haired girl being dared to chug two cans of beer, Lisa being admitting that her first kiss was a girl, and the cute guy revealing he has an entire collection of anything banana related.

 

"Well Chaeng, it's your turn!!!" Lisa slurs. I laugh, honestly having no idea why I did. Oh god, I'm drunk.

 

"Damn, Jennie. You're fucking quick. You left this in my car." I heard someone say. I quickly took a glance to my right when I saw her. Again. She looked... surprised??

 

"Do you want to leave?" Lisa whispers beside me. Yes. I badly wanted to say yes. Instead, "No, I'm having fun! Truth mofos!!"

 

"Who was your first love?" The blue haired guy asked and I gulp. I feel the heat in my cheeks. Suddenly it's too hot in here like the temperature just risen 80 degrees higher. I haven't really talked about her for years. It's always been that way, of course, since I moved to Australia. I know he meant no harm, but it seemed to be such a personal question.

 

"I used to call her J. We were friends, but well.. you know what they say about first love." I giggle, fighting back the tears.

  
  
"...they never die?" Someone asks and I burst out in laughter. "Oh, please. They say first loves never work out. I don't fucking have an idea why, but they just never do." I sigh, as the room around me starts to spin faster. I think I'm going to be sick. I have drank so much.

 

I excused myself from the room and head upstairs to find a bathroom. Finally, one of the doors does open. Unfortunately, it’s not a bathroom. It’s a bedroom, and, even more unfortunate for me, it’s one which in she was there, lied down across the bed while she was straddling the tall guy from earlier.

 

• • • • • 

 

_I know my updates are not consistent but I'm trying to update as sooner as I can, also I would appreciate if you left comments hehe :-)_


	5. JENNIE

**It's 9 AM and I woke up later than usual. I was really tired last night, spending the whole night with Chaeng at the greenhouse. Her parents were fighting again, as usual, I guess. I honestly don't get why people would want to marry when they know it's going to fail. It's like setting yourself up for something unfortunate.**

 

**I hurried into the greenhouse as soon as I brushed my teeth when I noticed the door was a bit open. Who else could have been here? Has Chaeng harvested the roses we planted?**

 

**My eyes dart to the bench, noticing a red post it.**

_**"Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, J." — Chaeng.** _

 

**No, it couldn't be. She's not leaving me. She's just being her usual sweet self, isn't she?**

 

**I ran out of the greenhouse and into their backdoor. But it was locked. Once I got to the front lawn, a big sign stating "FOR SALE" has been put. No, no, no, no. She cannot. This isn't real. Can someone pinch me? I'm having a nightmare, aren't I? Tears are streaming down my face, and I can't do anything to stop them.**

 

**I repeatedly pinch my arms and it hurts. No, no, no, no. Chaeng, where is she? I sat on the bench, patiently waiting for her to hug me and tell me everything is gonna be fine, and that we'll swim together.**

 

**My thoughts are all over the place as I fall asleep, and images of clouded roses and memories of her through my dreams.**


	6. ROSÉ

"Can I help you?" the guy, I think I heard someone call him Kai. He sits up, with Jennie still on his torso. Jennie's face is flat, she's neither amused nor embarrassed. I shuffled uncomfortably, feeling like I just want to disappear and POOF.

 

“Oh . . . no. Sorry, I . . . I’m looking for a bathroom." They seem to be a good match, honestly. I would have to admit that.

 

"Okay?? Then go find one." He rolls his eyes and I nod, leaving the room. Once the door has closed, I lean my back against it. No matter how much I want her back, I know we can't just pick up where we left off and start all over again. I did this so I would have to suffer from the consequences.

 

I decide to find the kitchen and pour myself a glass of water. The last thing I want to do is open another door and find drunken hormonal college students on top of one another. Again. I think that encounter had just sobered me up. I need to find a way to get to the dorm, but I spot Lisa at the crowd and she's clearly wasted.

 

"Having fun?" one of the guys from the group earlier asks me. I smile a bit but it doesn't reach my eyes. However, I'm relieved to see a familiar face.

 

"Well... not exactly. How long do these parties last?"

 

"All night . . . and until the day tomorrow . ." He laughs and I panic. I wanna get out of here, ASAP.

 

"I'm Jungkook, by the way. You can call me Kook, I guess?" He smiles genuinely and I feel bad that I can't bring myself to smile back no matter how much I want to, cause he seems like a nice guy.

 

"Rosé. Do you think there are spare rooms upstairs I could crash at? I'm really tired and I just wanna go home, but sadly everyone and even I am too drunk to drive." He nods, and leads me upstairs.

 

He led me to the third room on the right hallway, which happened to be just in front of the room where I saw Jennie earlier. The picture of them is still clear as day in my head and I desperately want it to be gone.

 

"You sure you'll be okay here? I can literally just get you an Uber to get to the dorms or something." He gives me a reassuring smile, which has seemed to work.

 

"Yeah, I don't wanna leave Lisa here anyways. I don't know where she crashed but if she hasn't, please let her stay here." He nods, absorbing my words.

 

"Yeah, yeah of course. Good night, Rosie." He turns off the lights and I am once again left with my thoughts.


	7. JENNIE

"Who's she?" Kai asks me as soon as I got out of that hell of a room. I felt like the air has been sucked, making it hard for me to breathe.

 

"Is she—?" He follows up when I don't answer. I decided to go upstairs, as the yard is just too crowded and I feel like I need to be alone, to breathe. I nod, and Kai sighs, tugging at his jet black hair. He's seated at the edge of the bed, careful with his actions and words.

 

"I know I will never be her but, really, Jennie, she doesn't seem to care about you. She hasn't even told you she's back. Fuck, if I were here I would jump into your arms straight from the airport. Heck, I wouldn't even leave at the first place. You deserve so much better. That might not be me, but please, allow yourself to be loved and to love."

 

My feelings get the best out of me and I climb into his lap, crashing my lips onto his. His lips were plump, moving in sync with mine. I don't know what I'm doing but I try not to overthink. Is this really what I want?

 

He gently pushes me onto the bed and I am on top, never breaking our kiss, when the door suddenly opens, revealing Rosé. This day really couldn't get any worse.

 

"Can I help you?" Kai asks her. She's flustered, and reeks of alcohol.

 

“Oh . . . no. Sorry, I . . . I’m looking for a bathroom." She stutters. I hate that I can't bring myself to speak and confront her. After almost a decade, never I would think we would meet again... let alone at this way.

 

"Okay?? Then go find one." Kai rolls his eyes and closes the door. I sit up straight, trying to process what just happened.

 

After what felt like hours since Kai closed the door, he sighs for about the nth time today and says, "I won't rush you, Jennie. But please do know that I'm always here for you. I'm willing to settle for whatever you're capable of."

 

"Thank you, Kai. I don't know why love has got to be this complicated." I managed to say in between sobs. He takes my head and rests it on his shoulder, and we stay like that.

 

"It's not supposed to be that complicated, Jennie."

• • •

  
I wander off the halls in search for Kai. I desperately want to get out of here. Going down, I tried to ask around but everyone is just too occupied moping onto someone or is too drunk to be coherent. Giving up, I decided to go back upstairs when I saw the third room on the right hallway, just in front of the one I crashed at, was slightly opened. Curiosity gets to me and I decide to step into the room.

 

The lamp was on, and Rosé's face is illuminated. A little frown was painted on her face as she fell asleep, and I wish I could have done something to wipe that away.

 

I gently run my fingers through her cheeks, one of the things I love about her the most. She doesn't budge, and I exhaled, not knowing I've been holding my breath during the whole time I entered the room.

 

I grab a blanket from the wardrobe and put it on her.

 

"I love you, Chaeng. I always have." I tell her, although I know she won't be able to hear the words. Giving her a peck on the forehead, I left the room.


End file.
